It took me two long years to get pregnant after suffering a miscarriage with my first pregnancy. When I finally held my first child in February 2010, he was everything I had hoped and prayed for. More than anything, I wanted to be a mom. My brother and sister-in-law had kids before us, and while I really loved being an auntie, I was so happy to finally have my own child to raise and do fun activities with—like going to the zoo; It should have been one of the happiest days. Unfortunately, at 5 months post-partum, I pulled out my summer clothes and found that nothing fit. I had gained a lot of weight with the pregnancy and weighed an all-time high of 299lbs. I squeezed into the largest capris and a nursing-friendly t-shirt and set off to meet my parents and brother’s family, baby in tow.
You did it.
You finally got over the fear of never eating bread again and jumped on the keto bandwagon. You’ve white-knuckled it through the dreaded carb-flu and now the fog has cleared. Suddenly the weight is coming off effortlessly and you feel free for the first time ever from needing to carry an emergency granola bar in your purse at all times. There are so many mixed feelings; the pure joy of having found something that finally works, the superiority over your co-workers who are still shackled to their sugary pumpkin spice latte habits and the legitimate anger that we’ve all been lied to about what an optimal human diet actually looks like.
Picture this scenario if you will: one morning you wake up, swing your feet out of bed and notice you’re swimming in your pyjamas. You rush to a mirror and find to your sheer delight that somehow all of the excess fat on your body has melted away overnight! You stand there admiring yourself. The fact that (for the first time ever) you literally don’t have anything to wear to work doesn’t even put a dent in your pure joy. Now everything will fall into place. Now you can finally be happy.
Eddie Morra seems stuck. His life is grey and uninspired, his career is going nowhere and his girlfriend just dumped him. Things look pretty bleak. Then everything changes when he encounters a smart drug that enables him to access the entirety of his brain power. Suddenly life is in colour and full of possibility. Tasks that once seemed impossible become effortless. He is filled with a new zest for life—he wants to learn, he wants to discover, he wants to be and do all he can. The limitations that kept his life small and grey have been abolished.
We all know what it’s like to feel stuck and long for transformation. But unlike man-made quick-fixes that come with negative side-effects, each of us has something far superior available to us. When I first saw the movie, Limitless, I was struck by the similarity between the effects of the fictional smart drug and the supernatural life available to us through the Holy Spirit. When you’re yielded and filled with the Holy Spirit, it truly is like life is suddenly in colour and full of new possibilities.
It was the perfect storm. My husband was away for five days and I was home alone with the kids. I had just got them settled with supper and stood in the kitchen contemplating the next thing on my to-do list. I was stressed out. I was tired. I was bored. I had a thought, “some sugar would perk you up. You deserve it. A few bites won’t hurt.” Before I gave it much thought, I decided to comply. As I took the first few bites I began to feel control slipping away. The casualty ended up being half a frozen tuxedo cake. Intellectually, I knew that cake could not solve any of my problems (only add to them actually), but something inside compelled me to stand there at the kitchen counter shovelling cake into my mouth while I stewed in self-pity and shame.
Slowly but surely our society is adapting to the larger size of today’s “average” woman. Plus-size clothing is becoming increasingly available, even trendy (it’s about time!). Plus-size models are becoming celebrities in their own right and inspiring “everyday” plus-size women to celebrate and display their own beauty on social media. This burgeoning culture of “beauty beyond size” is freeing women to accept themselves as they are, heal their relationships with their bodies, and hopefully recognize that it is meant for so much more than just being attractive.